you wonder "why"

hey guys,
this is the first chapter of a new book im working on, hope you like it. give me your thoughts

today i was told something that made my whole entire world come to a standstill, i wont indulge in the details, and i still cant believe it. basically, my parents arent working out. when my mom told me i just stared at her. i couldn't stop staring, truth was i wasnt really seeing her, i was staring at something far away. i didn't cry, didnt talk, i just turned around and went to my room. wierd huh? i sat in my room for what felt like 8 days, but was really only 30 minutes and thought "why?". it was that simple question that made my eyes instantly gloss over and before i knew it, my face was like an ocean. i just sat and cried, and cried, and cried. my mom called me to eat dinner but i had no appetite. i crawled into bed at 6:00pm and looked at my ceiling. once again i wasnt really seeing anything, it was far away. how were we going to get on without dad? my family was always the family that did EVERYTHING together and would be the last family that you would think would have problems. but, everything is not what it seems. i should've read more into the signs but i decided that they werent relevant. them retiring into their room so late at night and arguing, hoping noone could hear. them rarely spending one on one time together. and even them not laughing at eachothers jokes. i couldnt stand them for making me feel like this, for making me cry more than i ever had. why did it have to happen noe? why did it have to happen to my parents? why was i put into this situation? why did i feel like this? why why why why why why why? it's still all i could think about. im not depressed, i feel worse. it's almost like im not feeling. just like i wasnt seeing, i wasnt hearing or smelling. things were kind of just there. almost everything posed as an inanimate object, was i an inanimate object also? was this all just a dream? but no it wasnt. it was indeed my reality.

hey young world

wowww. it's been sometime since i have written here and i am deeply sorry. i've had soo much work to do (god, highschools a trick) and honestly haven't had much time excet for the occasional reading. i wanted to write to ya'll about on of my newly favorited series vampire academy. at first i thought the title of the series was corny (i mean okay, vampire school, just like a bunch of other books i've read) but waoh! this book was sooo much different from wat i excpected. the antagonist, rose, was anything but careful. she was mean, tough, and spoke her mind and thats wat i luv about her. her moroi(read the book to find out) is lissa, who she must defend as a ddhampir, who is EVERYTHING opposite of rose except for the fact that they are shadow kissed. this book is one you MUST READ. and along with this you may wanna read these books also:

1.the truth about forever-SARAH DESSEN
clockwork angel-CASSANDRA CLARE
immortal instruments series-CASSANDRA CLARE
magic in manhatten sereis(I FORGET BUT I BET YOU'LL FIND IT)
the uglies series- (FORGOT)
vampire diaries (although the first book was kinda boring, the rest are great)-(LJ SMITH)
fake boyfriend- KATE BRIAN
it's all about us series- SHELLEY ADINA
read my lips- FORGOT :(
ex-mas:(
ANY BOOK BY JENNIFER ECHOLS, JAMES PATTERSON, ELIZABETH CHANDELR (SUMMER IN THE CITY), SIMON PULSE BOOKS, HARPERTEEN, AND A COUPLE AVON READS!!!!
I WILL KEEP U POSTED ON ANY FUTURE BOOKS I READ AND HOPEFULLY U LUV THEM AS MUCH AS ID O. BYE GUYS

the seduction of evolution

hola senioritas,

One thing that i always wonder is why people say "technology will one day destroy us" so what? we're supposed to stop evolution? My freinds tell me that some things aren't evolution, but just plain greediness. And this is where i can't argue. There are so many greedy people out thier who will stop at nothing to make things that they know may be potentionally harmfull for the love of money. But then i realise that these people must have families and parents to support and put roofs over. And because of my own pro's and con's i wonder wether i will be one of those people. If i will be a greedy retailer only wanting money, or the person on the other side giving into this seduction. I'm not gonna lie i love my ipod. Yeah, it's like a psp and mp3 in one but it's amazing. Recently i heard of the chinese workers who make them and how little they are paid for extensive hours of work. It breaks my heart to see this happen to them, but am i (we) ready to stop using these things? Cuz at the same time they are overworked for little money, isn't it better then being unemployed with no money? Pros and cons people.

my class recently(not so recently) had a debate on the oil spill we are enduring and i am actually proud of my self. i was against oil companies running the economy and it really opened my eyes to ALL the horrible things we are doing to the environment. One kid on the oposing side stated "why are we so hung up on this? there's global warming out there, earthquakes, the aftermaths of them and we're crying over an oil spill? the necessary people will pay, and yes, eventually we all may. but why is everyone forgetting about the haiti crisis? the chile? the phillipiness?" and this kid had me thinking. i told him "yes, all these things are happening and i agree. but the thing is, this oil spill could've been prevented. im not blaming the workers or any of the people who have to do with it. but couldn't it have been prevented? is there no such thing as off shore drilling? we are losing animals and their habitats. i belive ALL these crisis' are horrible but there are somethings you have a hand over (littering, oil precautions etc.,) and other things you never know will strike (natural disasters)" and now im realising that our world is being punished for our carelessness. if we didnt take so much from the earth maybe greenhouse gases wouldnt even be here. if we werent so carless about where we dispense our garbage, maybe the hole in the ozone wouldnt be here. why must we do this?

~yours
with fries and hotsauce, xoxo

the harm of wondering

yo peeps,

wats good? haha, i always wonder why people choose this as their greeting. This is my first blog post and for some reason i feel like i have been doing this forever. For those wondering about my title; this blog will be about the trouble thinking can get you into, what my thoughts are, and just my life as a whole. I guess you could say i am one of those people who ver thinks things. If someone says "talk to you later" i begin wondering when "later" is and wether they'll actually talk. summer has just begun (no it hasnt. it's been like a month) and im finding summer to be fine. it's nothing special but it's not horrible. personally i have had a good summer so far. I have already: gone to boston, watched eclipse, gone to a teen conference, spent july 4th with the fam, and reminisced about my grade eight years.

yes, i am or was an eight grader. This is my last year as an eight grader, and i'm quite sad. I'm gonna miss ALL my frends and everyone who made my year what it was. But just because i'm going to highschool doesn't mean i'm going to stop being a kid or lose touch with my friends. That's one thing that upsets me, when people think that just because your going to highschool it means that you'll lose touch with you friends. You can only lose touch if you make no effort to stay in touch. It's funny cuz' i have always thought about what my first year of highschool will be like, who my friends will be, if i will make school teams, and if i will actually like my teachers. And now i can't sleep because i am SO eager to cross over to this wonderful new world. And i have circled my orientation date atleast 19274 times, im up to a point where i could honsetly say i am obsessed with highschool. i guess it's just the harm of wondering. lol

~yours
with chicken and gravy, xoxo